It’s said and done…

Hi all,

I’ve spent the last couple of days thinking about what to write here. I decided not to write anything yesterday as my mother always told me, ‘If you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all.’

Also, my head is all over the place so the chances are that this post will be too so please forgive me if I confuse you at all…

I’ll start by telling you a little bit about myself… My husband is in the british army, which means he can spend days, weeks, even months at a time away from home (I’m one of the lucky ones as Matt hasn’t had to be deployed- YET).

Anyone who knows about military life more than likely knows how sucluded it can be. You move somewhere, you make friends and close conections, then you are posted half way up the country and are ripped away from those friends. There comes a time in most army wives life that she gives up on trying to meet new people or make new friends. For me, that time is now… I haven’t given up because I know I will be moving again in 2-3 years… No, I have given up because Army Wives are known as curtain twitches… This means they love to be in everyones business, they start rumours about ‘friends’ and neighbours, purely for their own entertainment. They are ‘horrible’ to say the least. I’m aware I, myself, am an  Army Wife and I don’t doubt for a single second there are nice ones out there- I’m just yet to meet them.

In our last ‘posting’ I met some wonderful friends that I will cherish for the rest of my life but sadly meeting those friends also brought some enimies- they are the curtain twitchers I spoke of earlier-  I had such a bad experience living there that it has scared me half to death to even take my children to school… I’m terrified another wife will try and talk to me and want to keep in touch… I have sucluded myself to my home and refused my husbands offers of inviting his friends and their wives for dinner ect.

Sadly, this has lead me to be the loniest I have ever been. I have no contact with my parents or siblings, and very little contact with my Grandparents as they live such busy lives. I am aware I have brought this on myself and whenever I build up the courage to talk to someone new, I chicken out last minute.

I like to be an optimust. I see the bright side of every situation and express it for the world to hear. I get emotional at times, just as everyone does, but I never allow it to be seen. My husband hadn’t seen me cry for over a year- until last night. He came home from a few days away with work and I just collapsed in his arms, crying like a newborn baby. He was so startled to see me cry he thought I had done something wrong, when the truth is, I just couldn’t hide my emotion any longer.

I feel very blessed for my virtual friends- facebook, blog, twitter, ect- and you are all so lovely and extremely encouraging… I can’t thank you enough for all the kind words you have given me.

The future is always unclear for a military family- We are used to packing up our house every few years and moving to an address the army give us, where ever it may be in the world. But as Matt comes to the final few years of his carreer, we have been talking about what to do next. All we know is military life (both of us coming from Army or Navy families) and the thought of living in ‘civvie street’ as we call it, scares the life out of me.

I guess, where I’m going with this is, you never know what the future holds, where life will take you or what Gods (if you believe in him) plan is for you… You just have to work hard, do best by your children/family and I guess you get back what you put in… And that’s what I intent to do. I have got my course work and I’ve started reading through the moduels, so I will work, live and sleep untill one day, I get back what I earn (hopefully).

Thank you for reading and I sincerly hope I haven’t put anyone in a bad mood for the rest of the day…

See you soon beautiful people xxx

The Monday Blues

Good mornign everyone. So here we are- Monday morning and felling blue.

As I decided, last night, it was time for bed, I took one last look in my sitting room and thought, ‘the next time I’ll be in this room, I’ll be rushing around like a hatter, trying to get the children ready for school.’… And low and behoold- I have be as mad as a hetter all morning- finally getting the chance to sit down for five minutes- until my 3-year-old came to me and said, ‘look mum, I have a sticker.’ It turns out, he has pulled the toy story stickers off his wall… I havent been to see the damage of the paint yet- I fear I may cry if i do.

So my weekend was… eventful. I’m not a big drinker but as a friend- my best friend- came to visit, from Germany, I felt I had a responsibility to take him out and show him around- after all… It was Pink Friday… What is Pink Friday? I hear you ask… Well, it’s a day where my best friend and I wear everything pink, drink pink drinks and listen to Pink or Nicki Minaj- Pink Friday… It’s become a regular thing for us, and we love it!

Needless to say I felt a bit worse for wear on Saturday and Sunday- Two day hangovers are just shameful. But thankfully, today I am feeling better.

Also on friday- Before the pink champagne was opened- I had another look at ‘The Writers Bureau’ website… I was advised many months ago that if I plan to take my writing seriously, I should give it a go… Unfortuatly I couldn’t afford it before, but as I have recently moved and hubby has a better position in work, we have the money to afford the monthly payments. So…… taa-daa, ladies and gentleman, I would like to introduce myself as a Writers Bureau student (awaiting for my course work)

So- there is my events of the weekend. I’m sure tomorrow, when my head is fully clear, I will have a more productive and interesting blog…

Thank you for reading and I’d love to hear your events from the weekend past.

God Bless you my beauties xxx


Still trying to figure this out

Hi all, well I spent some time yesterday trying to figure out this site, but still with no luck. I guess my parents tried to shield me from the 21st century technology and succeed- Completely useless.

Anyway.. After my 1st blog (which I seem to have lost) I got to thinking about my writing and where I’d like to be in 5 or 10 years, which made me think, I have a 13year-old son… I could be a grandmother in ten years (scary). So where will Grandma be in ten years…? I write adult romance (erotica) so I guess my grandchild won’t be reading my work any time soon.

The truth is, I have no idea where I will be and what I will be doing.

The dream is to move to America once hubby finishes his time in the army, husband starts his own electricians business and I carry on with my writing as much as possible.

It’s simple to have dreams, but how do we put them into practace?

Anyway… I’m getting away from what I wanted to say… Like I said, I write adult romance and as I do more research for my second story I started to think about the seven deadly sins. My absolute favorite sin is LUST.

Lust can be anything from wanting another human being to simply craving after that chocolate bar that’s been in the fridge for the past six weeks. We all feel lust at some point of the day. For example- I caught a glimps of my lovely new postman yesterday… Such a dish. But that’s alright, because I’m a married woman who LOVES her husband.

If it’s alright to lust after that chocolate bar, then is it alright to lust after another person, who isn’t your spose?

I’m not talking about cheating… That’s a big NO in my book… But simply ‘looking at the menu but not ordering any ice-cream’ if you will.

Well, that is the predicament that my new charater is having and I hope to have an answer for him by the end of the day.

A predicament to say the least, if you ask me 🙂

Well, my lovlies, I thank you for taking the time to read the inner, most secret thoughts of a crazy woman 🙂

See you soon beauties

New start

Hello felllow bloggers, I’ve decided to start a blog to jot down the average day of a wife, mother and ‘adult fiction’ writer… It’s a crazy one, that’s for sure 🙂